Friday, May 22, 2009

still waiting...

So, today was our "big ultrasound". It was the 20 week one which is when most people find out what they're having and also make sure there is nothing abnormal about their baby. I woke up around 6:45am and couldn't go back to sleep so I had my quiet time. I must say, it was the best one I have had in a long time. I really needed that time with the Lord. I met Chris at our doctors office at 10:30 and we waited to be called back for the ultrasound. The whole thing went not as we had envisioned. The ultrasound tech seemed like she was in a hurry and wanted to get it over with. She was really rough with us until we opened up to her and told her what we're going through. I asked her if the cyst on Kate's brain was gone and she replied "what cyst?" Chris said "well we were told last week that she has a cyst on the left side of her brain..." she scanned back over her brain and sure enough there it was. Plain as day to see... I don't know how in the world she missed it!! This was supposed to be a thorough scan to measure everything to make sure there weren't any markers. The whole appointment was disappointing (as far as the tech and the care we got goes). The great news is that the cyst is the same size and is not growing! We are going back next Wednesday to the radiology department to have another ultrasound which will be a lot more thorough than the one we received today. It was so amazing to see the difference in Kate, she is getting so big! She put her feet right up to the camera, shes got her mommas feet for sure! Her bones are bigger...everything looked perfect to us! We still have a peace about this situation when it comes to downs. We are confident that she is clear of it and will be perfectly healthy. We are however exhausted. Physically and emotionally. Today is when everything has caught up with me and I feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders. I'm not sure why. I could cry at the drop of a penny and I have. I'm tired. Chris is tired. We are praying for strength to get us through the days ahead. To continue to stay strong and trust that our little girl is going to be ok. It's easier said than done to say "don't worry". The Lord is building our faith everyday and for that, we are thankful. We are learning something huge out of this. I'm thankful for it. Please remember us in your prayers and also remember little Kate.....love and hugs!

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