Friday, June 11, 2010

To post or not to post...

I mentioned that I would do a post about friends. I went back and forth on doing a blog about this but have been urged by several to do it. I'm going to try to make this short..
I have been hurt by several girls who I used to call friends and some who I hardly even know. I am the kind of girl who puts myself out there. I love people, I love to have a good time & love to be friends with everyone (the sweet, the geeks & everyone in between) and I don't really care what other people think of me. I have had an awesome mixture of friends my whole life.
I've been told that there are some people (who I hardly know) who think I'm stuck up, spoiled & just don't like me. That is fine. People can think what they want of me but I can promise you that I am far from all of that. I guess what hurts the most are the girls who I used to call friends who are putting me down in front of others and are the farthest thing from being a friend. I've had several talks with close friends and family about this. I've taken a close hard look at myself to see if there was something I was doing, was there something I was saying...what has changed? Nothing has changed. I have been praying about this and asked the Lord to show me if there is something I need to change. My heart is pure when I say that I have not changed and there is nothing I have done to hurt, offend or come off in a certain way. If anything, I have become more sensitive towards others. 
I have been told that jealousy is the root of this after seeking counsel from others whom I look up to and respect. Why people are jealous, I could not tell you but it's sad. I wish people could be happy for others. I do have a blessed life, I am the first to tell you. We work hard, we save and we thank the Lord for all He has blessed us with daily.
I've had friends tell me that before they were friends with me they thought I was stuck up. That hurt. I even had one person come to me and apologize for judging me. They apologized to me because they assumed I was stuck up, after spending a week with me they came to me and apologized for that thought and found that I was far from that. That was huge to me. I don't know if it's because I can be a little loud, I get excited easily...what? Some people get the view that I'm ditzy, a typical blond... Whatever it is, it needs to end. 
I am a girl who wears my heart on my sleeve. I was crushed last week after hearing what some people are saying about me. Totally crushed my spirit. If only they knew me.
Don't worry, all of these girls who have been trash talking and been plain mean are out of my life. I have been and am still going through and deleting them from everything (phone, email & facebook). Life is too short to be a hater & I am not going to waste anymore time on those kind of people.
I have bigger and better things to focus my attention on. I have an amazing husband, a precious baby girl, a family who is incredible and friends that are true and beautiful.
You know those little sayings...
"don't judge a book by it's cover"
 &
"you never know what someone is going through until you walk in their shoes"....
End it people. Be happy for others. Love one another & never ever judge someone you don't know.
::Deep breath::
That felt good to get off my chest...now, I'm moving on...

2 comments:

Jamie Fingal said...

I am sorry that this has happened to you. Jealousy is a terrible thing, and it still amazes me when I hear things like this. Like get over it. You Go Girl. Love you so much!

BJEBREWINGTON said...

Very nicely said (well wrote).....good for you for letting the "bad" people go....it's not worth it at all!!! I feel ya but for me it's not necessarily friends but family...ugh...!