Skip to main content

More thoughts.

These past two weeks have been a whirlwind. In a way they have gone fast and in a way it sort of feels like time has stood still. It is unbelievable how fast my life changed and how different it was two weeks ago tonight. I'm sure the majority of you are wondering why losing my grandpa has been as difficult on me as it has. I realize that what I had with him was something special and is not something everybody gets to experience. My grandparents have always played a very large roll in my life. I called them for everything. Whether it was to just talk about the day, to vent about something that was bugging me or if I needed a little encouragement. One of the last conversations I had with my grandpa was about the trip to anywhere in the world that Chris won. He was so excited for us and said, "why don't you use the airfare to fly to Hawaii and stay in our timeshare?" That's how he was, always wanting to do things for us and he did. I look around our house and almost every piece of furniture was bought by them. Our dining room furniture, our bedroom set, the rocker in the nursery, Kate's toy box and most recently our new double stroller. He would have paid our house off if he could, he was just that way. We treasured each other. I would do anything for them and I did my best with all I had within me. I knew this day would come when I could no longer pick up the phone and talk to him. I wanted to know that when it was all said and done and he was with Jesus that I would have no regrets. It feels so good to lay here tonight and smile as I think about what we had. I'm at peace and joy fills my heart when I think about where he is at this very moment. He is home in Heaven with the Creator or Heaven and Earth! He is healed! He is no longer suffering and has no more pain. Do you know how comforting that is? Tonight something very special happened at our dinner table with our Kate. I won't go into details but I will say that God is so good and blessed us with a very special gift in letting us know that my grandpa is watching over us. It's something I will never forget. I love how the Lord knows exactly what we need and when to give it to us. We are so undeserving of His loving kindness and I am so thankful that He still chooses to pour it out upon us.
My precious grandma is not is good shape at all. I know the Lord is preparing a place for her in Heaven and I am soaking up all the time I can with her. If I could, I would sit with her all day and take care of her every need. I want to bless her like she has blessed my life. The only way I know how is to pour out my love on her, comfort her and pray the Jesus will meet her where she is at and meet all the needs that is not humanly possible. Tears are rolling down my cheeks as I look back on all the sweet memories we have shared. Oh how I would love to go back and relive some of them. But instead I will move ahead, thankful for what I have had and cling tight to those memories. God has great things in store and I am confident that He will heal this hurt that is in my heart and one day these tears will turn into smiles when I look back at what I'm going through today.
God is faithful! He always has been and always will be! I keep reminding myself of that saying.."If God brings us to it, He IS going to get us through it." I believe that with all of my heart. Just because things don't always go as we have planned, doesn't mean that God isn't paying attention or He doesn't care. One day when our day comes and we stand before the Lord it will all make sense. I am confident of this. But for now, it's time to press on and live a life that is sold out for Jesus. I want to be like my grandpa leave a legacy just like he has...

the light of his life

 A Sunday afternoon bbq by the pool

So blessed to be loved by them
Life each day with no regrets,
you never know when it will be your last.


Jamie Fingal said…
A very loving tribute to Grandpa. You have such a gift when it comes to writing and expressing how you feel. Grandpa would be proud. I am more at peace in knowing he is in Heaven. Till we meet again. Love you, Nikki.

Popular posts from this blog

Family Room DIY makeover

Remember that one time my husband bought a tv wall mount and then I decided we needed a new tv stand? And then it made me realize our dark furniture would look way better if I lightened it up? And then it was time to get rid of the old dark throw pillows and dark rug? And then all of a sudden that fireplace looked so out of place. So we gutted it.  All because we put the tv on the wall!  Here’s a little walk down our DIY family room makeover.  Before .  I started with this old corner cabinet that i got for free years ago and painted chocolate brown.  I dusted her off and went to town with chalk paint.  Then I got rid of the old dark rug and started changing out our throw pillows.  Then it was onto the fireplace.  Before   Chris took out part of the wood floor to extend the floor of the tiny fireplace.  We also cleaned out the fireplace and sprayed it with cream paint that can withstand 1,200 degree temperatures.  And then we sucked out the old volcano rock and put in this fire glass fr

The best iced coffee, ever.

When Chris and I went to Mexico this past winter we quickly become addicted to their  blended espressos.  I found myself craving them when we got home so I played around with a couple of instant espressos and ended up making the best iced coffee, ever.  What you’ll need.  Medaglia D’oro instant espresso  Water  Ice Coffee creamer of your choice Heavy cream + caramel  Trust me on the instant espresso. I tried them all. This is the best. I get it at Kroger. I’ve also heard Walmart carries it as well as trusty amazon.  Step one.  Get your ingredients out.  I fill my glass up halfway with water and pour a capful of instant espresso in.  Mix it real good.  Time to cool it down.  Now comes the sweet part.  This next step is money.  Lordy.  If you’re feeling really naughty you can add caramel sauce.  Do it.  If you’ve been wanting the recipe for the BEST homemade caramel ever then you’re in luck.  This is the recipe from my mother in law.  It is life changing.  Ta-Da!  Tag me on Instagram at

Goodie Girl Cookie Pop Tarts

Summer is in full swing and Kate and I have a super fun, easy and delicious breakfast or even dessert idea for you to make!  First things first, go find some Goodie Girl Birthday Cake and Magical Animal cookies. They’re gluten free and to die for.  You can make this recipe gluten free by replacing the All Purpose Flour with Gluten Free Flour. Or if you want to skip the homemade dough all together you can use pie crust in the refrigerated section at the grocery store!  Here’s what I did.. HOMEMADE POP TARTS YIELD: 9 servings PREP: 1 hour COOK: 25 minutes TOTAL: 1 hour 25 minutes These are simple and SO delicious! A flaky, buttery pastry with strawberry and brown sugar cinnamon fillings, and they’re frosted, of course! INGREDIENTS: For the Brown Sugar-Cinnamon Filling ½ cup light brown sugar 1½ teaspoon ground cinnamon 4 teaspoons all-purpose flour For the Strawberry Filling ¾ cup strawberry jam 1 tablespoon cornstarch 1 tablespoon wat